Ugly Houses

I know that my house is not that pretty.  I am hoping to be able to have siding put on the side of my house in the next two years.  The weather (and kids' accidental moments from last winter) has not been kind to the exterior.

That being said, when people purposely choose ugly exteriors, it is a whole different thing.  I really wish I had a picture of this one house I drive by every time I take the kids to middle school.  It is located in a really nice neighborhood but has some barf-inducing pillars in the front.  I am not one to hate pillars; the ones of the White House are quite lovely.  This house though, it is one story with pillars.  Not nice pillars; short squatty pillars that practically hug the white stucco front walls. They were not even thin pillars; oh no, they are quite girthy.  Squatty and girthy - not what you want when it comes to pillars (among other things...).

These "pillar" community members who owned the house lost it to the bank.  I am guessing they spent too much on the home building loan to get those grandiose and pretentious (not to mention beastly) pillars that they went bankrupt.  Only someone with such magniloquent ambitions could even contemplate such atrocities.  I should know all about people like that; my dad used to be a construction worker in southern California for rich people.

A few weeks ago, as I was driving the middle school carpool, I noticed one of the pillars had fallen over.  It was a miracle! I told all the kids (there are four of them) that I had actual magical powers because I happened to be mulling over in my head illegal thoughts of doing that neighborhood a favor and knocking one of those pillars down.  Then I saw one of the pillars on the ground seemingly crying out for someone to break it to dust; to put it out of its shameful existence.  I am 100% certain that this pillar tried to commit suicide but I told the kids it was my mind that made it fall over.  At first, the kids (remember, we are talking middle school age kids) believed me.  I had to break it to them that I really wasn't magical, but by being a mother, I still have mommy magic powers and that one day they will become adults and have children of their own and then they will receive their own mommy or daddy magic powers.

Oddly enough, a couple of days later, by some random act, the vacant house's fallen pillar was up again; sort of jammed back into the small slot made for it.  I could tell it was ashamed because a few days later, it was on the ground again.  To make things even weirder, the next time I drove by, by golly the pillar was back up!  Who keeps trying to revive this pillar? Let it die in peace!

Well, up until a few days ago, this house was still vacant and a sad "For Sale" sign begged people for attention.  Someone saw this ugly duckling and decided this was the house for them.  As I drove the kids to school today, I saw construction workers graciously taking down the rest of those pillars.  I could hear the sighs of relief from the downed pillars.  They are finally at peace.